Thursday, March 28, 2013

Very Overwhelmed and Trying to Cope


Today I'm going a bit more personal than I normally do. Call it the culture of how I was raised or just my shyness about sharing incredibly personal information, but normally I keep things to mysself. But as of recent I've been extremely overwhelmed with life. It's come from multiple aspects and all the while I'm trying to cope with those factors I've been fighting an internal struggle I let very few know.

I've suffered from depression to various degrees since I was a teen. At some points in my life it has been almost non existant while at others it has been crushing. The stress since losing my full time job in the fall of 2011 has been very difficult on me. As the primary breadwinner and financial support of our home I've fought with many emotions handling it. Now I'm working again and I'm working a lot but I'm still under employed. I may have 3 jobs but they don't financially equal up anywhere near my old full time job. We've had house issues, car issues, and family issues on top of that.

I finally broke down a little over a month ago and went to my doctor about it. He started me on some medication which has resulted in some adjustment difficulties. I had finally begun to adjust after 2 weeks when my refill we delayed because of my issurance for a week. Goind cold turkey off of that was not fun. I just got back on it a few nights ago so now I expect an new adjustment period. The worst side effect while adjusting is extreme tireness.

I'm sure you can image that in my case being extremely tired is probably the worst possible thing for me because my productivity has nose dived.

I don't know how much it's the medication, the stress finally catching up with me or the increased workload but doing anything beyond just enough to get by is tough. Care for my house is slipping, I struggle to make quality time with my kids, with hubby and I've been neglecting Treegold and Beegold.

I'm anxious for summer to be here. Come May I should be switching to only my online teaching job full time and no longer be substitute teaching. With the job being from home I can hopefully manage my job time with Treegold and Beegold activities. Until then things are going to be a bit tough.

So just hang in here with me. I have loads of ideas in the my head and I keep writing them down but it's just having a problem managing my time to get them done. Also I'm looking for people who would like to be active moderators on either the Facebook Pagan Parenting Group, Pagan Parenting Page or the counter parts on Google +.

Send me a message if you're interested.

I hope everyone had a great Equinox. I'm aiming to post up some pictures of my munchkins Egg Hunt this weekend.

Blessings,

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9 comments:

  1. I hope this summer finds your workload ease! :/ & a pox on your idiot insurance company...screwing with meds is an evil git of a thing to do.

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    1. I hope so too. Thank you for always stopping by. :)

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  2. *Huge hugs* I'm currently trying to get off my meds since we're trying for little one #2 and now it suddenly has a warning about not taking during 3rd trimester, plus they always say these things are ok until they create a ton of problems so I didn't want to chance it but coming off them is awful. At least 10 times worse than what I started taking them for. >.< Much love to you & I hope things get better soon. ♥ ♥♥

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    1. It was awful! I've been back on them for 2 weeks now so I'm starting to get back to normal. Good luck though on getting back to your norm and on the making of #2. :)

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  3. I've done the medication boogie before and stopping/starting can be a nightmare! Here's hoping this adjustment period won't be as hard (it gets easier to adjust with some meds over time).

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    1. I'm through it now thankfully. Thank you so much for the kind words and yes I think it was a bit easier this second time.

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  4. Siento mucho por lo que estás pasando. Yo también me he sentido agobiada y he tenido fuertes depresiones. Soy bipolar, y tengo que tomar medicamentos para la depresión y para dormir. No los dejes, no es bueno para tu salud, además, siempre tienes que volver a tomarlos y vuelves a sufrir los efectos colaterales. Cuando te encuentres mejor, dile a tu médico que te baje la dosis.
    Te deseo toda la suerte del mundo, fuerza y paz.
    Un abrazo

    http://lulurulitos.blogspot.com (de todo un poco)
    http://atrapadaenmisletras.blogspot.com (mis escritos)

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    1. Thank you so much for the kind words. When I was younger Drs thought I was bi-polar but I think I was misdiagnosed. This is my first try with anti-depressives. I hope to not be on them forever but right now they're definitely helpful.

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  5. I am so sorry you had to go through all that with the medication. I have been over medicated by doctors who though the only solution for anything was to push another pill in a higher dosage on me, and I ended up going cold turkey off 3 pills at once and it was HORRIBLE. But I chose to do it. I can't imagine how much it sucks when you don't WANT to. (((hugs)))

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